Friday, January 16, 2009

These Golden Moments

HERCULES: Father! I have defeated the Gorgonites!

ZEUS: Well done, Hercules. Your wrestling skills have saved Olympus.


But there is one more task you must fulfil. Remember the prophecy.


You must suplex each of us.

HERCULES: But… father! If I suplex you, you will die!

ZEUS: It is the prophecy.

HERCULES: No, father. I don’t care about the prophecy. I believe we choose our own destiny. In the Oracle’s pool I saw a vision of the future. Of a great man people called “Washington”…

(swell of heart-warming music)

…a man who showed his people the way to freedom, to become the greatest of nations!

(moment of awestruck silence)

(then an animal roar, a burst of drum and bass music)

ATHENA: Herc, look out! Behind you!

HERCULES: What the -!?

(roaring continues, with fighting sounds)

HERCULES: Aaaa-tomm-iiic dropp!!!


  1. Wow. I feel somehow curiously sad that the phrase "but father, if I suplex you, you will die" has been unleashed into the internet ether.

    That phrase is important to me, yo.

  2. this feels like something dean should be commenting on...

    and strangely brian-like familiar