HATH ANYWUN ELTH GOB UH BIH ATH THNAKE COIL ROUN THEY BITHEP?

Coth Ah do.
Yuh, you herr mih.

Ah tel you duh thtowy.
Wun mowwin Ah wake up an Ah feel ih. Thomthin tigh roun mah ahm. Ah thoh mebbe they doctahs they clime inna my beh uh tay mah bwud pwetha.
Bud ih wudn.
Ih wudda thnake.

Ah gibum uh name. Eeth caw Fwankie. Fwankie duh Thnake.

Whun Ah goethda gym tuh liff mah weith, theyth aw be wuggin at Fwankie. Theyth be within theyth gob theyselb uh bih ath thnake. Buh nah, they dohn. An Ah be pummin they weith an mah bithepth be aw pumm up, an Fwankie be feewin ih. Eeh be lih “oo Cwith you be so pumm up Ahth gunna hathda wetht mah coilth a libbl.”
Yuh.
Un dennah goethda thop an Ah gess mythel uh Lucothade. An ah be all pumm up an be wearun them t-thir ain gob no thleebes. Un they wimmen they be lih “oo Cwith hooth yuh fwen” un Ah thays “Fwankie” an theyth all be wanninda paddim.
Yuh. I gotha hull buntha wimmen be waninda tuth mah thnake.

Ahth juth wunna thek wetha any youth awtho gob youthew a bih ath thnake. Weeth thtah ourthel uh cwub mebbe. “Thnake Cwub”.
Weeth geb ourthel thpethal t-thir an aw goethda gym togetha. Liff weith.